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The spring of 2020 will always be remembered in the context of “what might have been.”
Well, since many of you don’t have anything better to do, let’s play a game of “what would have been” as it pertains to the Texas Longhorns. After reading this, I’m quite sure many of you will make the assumption – with validity – that I’ve lost my mind.
● The Longhorns would’ve had spring football practice, of course, and would’ve concluded with the annual Orange-White scrimmage. During this scrimmage, quarterback Sam Ehlinger would have participated in three offensive plays – three more than what head coach Tom Herman would prefer – and he would have handed the ball off three times and left the field to a standing ovation from 40,000 fans.
● The Longhorn fans in attendance at the Orange-White scrimmage would’ve still been giddy about what Shaka Smart’s Texas basketball team had just done: win the NCAA championship. Yes, I know, I might be suffering from Corona PTSD after sitting at home for more than a month, but one of the great things about this time off is the time we can all sit in quiet solitude and dream. I dreamt Texas beat Texas Tech (again) in the Big 12 tournament, and ultimately knocked off Kansas and/or Baylor to punch their ticket to the dance. Once in the dance, Havoc ensued and we all sat on our couch and watched Andrew Jones cut down the nets during “One Shining Moment.” I try and dream big.
● Speaking of dreams – and this one is a bit less far-fetched – I dreamt that David Pierce’s baseball team spent early summer in Omaha, Nebraska, where they ate steak and also won the national championship. On a serious note, perhaps I feel most sorry for the Texas baseball team, a squad that seemed to have just the right amount of youthful exuberance and talent combined with veteran knowledge and gifts. More importantly, it looked like this team also had pitching. Just as I count the football national championship stolen from Texas in what would’ve been Vince Young’s final season, I’ll go to my grave with my hunch that the Longhorns could’ve very well won the title in Omaha this season.
● Ditto the Texas softball team, whose star pitcher, Miranda Elish, was awarded as the sport’s player of the year. The team was literally top-ranked when the season came to an end, so I am well within my rights to say that this group would’ve won the world series in Oklahoma City.
● And finally, both Texas’ men and women’s golf teams would’ve won national championships, after which Chris Del Conte would’ve given me a lifetime membership to the University of Texas Golf Club because of my stellar press coverage. I became the “old dude who sits in the pro shop and shoots the **** with the other old dudes every day” guy for the rest of my life.
Unfortunately, my dream ended before I got to tennis, track and the other spring sports. But yeah, those teams would’ve won national championships, too.
So now you know what would’ve happened. Don’t at me, as the young folks say.